In My Name

It happened again today. In the mail was notification that we are included in a class action lawsuit against someone with whom we do business. It works something like this. A group of lawyers decide they want to make some money, so they pick a nice big corporation, such as an insurance company, and find some reason--it doesn't matter how trivial--to sue them. They file the necessary papers and then, in the discovery phase, they compel this company to supply the names of their customers. Then they sue in the name of those customers. My name. They sue in my name. I don't hire these lawyers. I don't want to hire these lawyers. I'm perfectly happy with my insurance company, and I want them to make money for the service they provide, and I want their expenses to be as low as possible, so my insurance premiums remain low. Nevertheless, they are being sued in my name. Then the lawyers settle out of court, and take millions of dollars in "legal fees," from this company for the work they did in my name so I could gain some worthless something.

A rock shattered my windshield once. (That's windscreen for my British readers.) I called the insurance company from the school at which I was teaching at the time. They sent a glass company to my workplace that very day and replaced the windshield on my van while I worked. Was I pleased? Pleased as punch. I even called my agent to compliment him on the wonderful service. However, for this incident, they were sued in my name. The basis of the suit? It is alleged they didn't make it clear enough to me that they weren't installing original factory parts. Actually, my agent did give me the option to choose factory parts, which would have involved a much more inconvenient process. But the truth doesn't matter so much here, does it? My gain? If I had the paperwork from several years before when the incident happened, I could apply for a refund of a small portion of any money I spent.Of course I didn't spend any. But the lawyers got millions for suing in my name.

Once a company that sells magazines and promotes them with a sweepstakes (sound familiar?) was sued in my name because it was alleged that they didn't make it clear enough that I could enter the contest without buying magazines. I had never bought any magazines from them nor entered their contest. They sued in my name because I was on their list to receive their junk mail. My gain? I received as part of the settlement, an entry in future contests without having to enter--in other words, nothing. The lawyers? They received millions for suing in my name.

I'm starting to keep a file of these notices. There's my life insurance company that was sued in my name because it was alleged they didn't properly disclose that if I elected to make monthly payments rather than a yearly payment, I would be paying a few dollars more. (I have my twelve times down, the math really wasn't a problem for me.) My gain? (You'll love this one.) If, and only if, I died within the next eighteen months, the insurance payout would be about fifty dollars higher. Tempting, but I think I'll stick around if the Lord permits. But the lawyers, who sued in my name won millions.

Now, to be fair, these notices always come with six or eight page legal documents that have somewhere, buried deep within them, instructions on how I can exclude my name from the lawsuit. Generally, I would have to write a letter, or something of that sort. Of course, most people don't read eight page legal documents written in fine print. They just toss it with the rest of the junk mail. And why should I have to act in order not to sue someone? It seems to me that the burden ought to be on these lawyers to get my permission to use my name.

We Americans now have a, "no call list," to announce our request not to be included on telephone solicitation lists. Why not a, "no sue list?" Or perhaps we need legislation that would require lawyers to get a signature and to fully disclose the likely outcome, before they enter into these class action lawsuits.  At any rate, I am very tired of hearing about the productive segments of our economy being threatened by these frivolous lawsuits and compelled to hand over millions of dollars in settlements to non-productive lawyers who carry on these scams in my name.

Comments

[Diane R]

I ma assuming you don't live in California. The people here put an end to this nonsense last November at the ballot box. And sadly, since the leigislators seem to be in the pockets of the lawyers, it's ballot propositions (if you have them in your state like we do here) that corrects this stuff.