Sometimes the ladies at my church joke about the "S" word.
The "S" word we are joking about is not that "S" word. The word is submission. We
joke this way, not because we think submission is a dirty word, but because we
know so many other people in the world see it that way. Submission is not
something only women are called to do, however. Submission is the duty of all
those under authority, which means submission is a duty for all of us.
Before talking about what submission is, I want to mention a
few things submission is not. Submission is not sycophantic boot-licking. It is
not tolerating tyranny, oppression, or abuse. It is not about biting your
tongue and keeping all opinions to yourself. It is not about ignoring your own
needs while serving every need and desire of another. It is not about letting
another person control every aspect of your life and every minute of your time.
It is not about letting your God-given rights be trampled by unlawful authority.
It is not about women being in subjection to men.
Submission is just one part of the total picture of lawful
authority that is shown to us in the Scriptures.
There are many other aspects
of the biblical view of authority that could be discussed, such as Christ
ruling over all rulers, the source of human authority, the scope and limits of
human authority, or the separate spheres of authority. Before we look more
closely at what submission is, however, I want to briefly touch on just one
other part of the total picture of authority: leadership, because godly
submission is meant to exist within a context of and in order to facilitate godly
leadership.
Christ Himself is the model of leadership which human rulers
ought to emulate. Husbands are told to love their wives as Christ loved the
church. Just how did Christ love the church? He suffered for her and laid down
His life for her. The needs of the church took priority over His own needs. The
biblical model of leadership is one of servant leadership. That is, the leader
serves the ones he leads, rather than the other way around. That is why here in
the once biblically-informed USA,
we call our elected leaders, "public servants." The term has survived, but it
is not always clear that the concept has done so.
Leaders are overseers. They provide oversight for the
God-ordained purposes of each of the governments. The family is to provide for
the physical, spiritual, and safety needs of its members. This includes food
and clothing and shelter, religious instruction and devotion, education,
discipline, and safety from danger or evil doers. The Church is to provide corporate
worship, including the Word and the Sacraments, and discipline. The civil
government provides protection from evildoers and justice (which is
qualitatively different from discipline). In all of these spheres of authority
leaders oversee these functions, but not necessarily do them themselves. They
are responsible for seeing that it is done.
So how would it go if someone was the leader of, say a
family, and no one acknowledged his authority, or no one let him make any
decisions? How could he possibly be responsible for seeing that the necessary
functions happened? My point is this: A leader cannot possibly serve as a
leader unless he has one necessary tool: the respect of those he serves. I am
not talking about a general respect for his person here. (That’s good, too!) I
am talking about a respect for his position and his authority. This is why
husbands vow, in a traditional marriage ceremony to provide for and cherish
(that is, love and put her needs above my own) their wives, and women vow to respect
and obey their husbands. These are the tools that make the family economy work.
They are also the tools that make leadership in the church and the civil
spheres work.
So what does biblical submission to authority look like?
First, a submissive person is actively involved in helping to accomplish the
mission of the group. A wife manages the home, helps discipline the children,
and helps manage the resources of the family as part of the family team charged
by God with the duty to fill the earth and subdue it. A church member actively
joins in the labors of the congregation, contributes to its financial needs,
and joins in the worship. A citizen pays taxes, votes, advises his or her
elected leaders, and serves on juries and in the military.
Think of the quarterback who gives the team the next play,
and the team says, "Okay, let's go!" Part of the active involvement in the group
mission is an understanding and agreement to go forward with the game plan.
What if the quarterback gave one play and some of the other team members decided
they will do something different? The mission will be thwarted and the leadership pointless.
Secondly, a submissive person may be actively involved in
the decision-making process. A man who doesn't listen to the counsel of a wise
wife is a fool. (Likewise is the man who listens to the counsel of a foolish
wife!) But when the final decision is made by the leader, the submissive person will
own that decision as if it is his or her own, and do whatever can be done to
help the plan move forward. As an example, a church is deciding whether to
build a new Sunday School wing. One man is against the plan. He speaks at
meetings against it, perhaps citing financial concerns or other things that
could be done with the land. The vote is taken and the plan is approved. What does
a submissive man do? He pitches in to help the project move forward, because it
was "our" decision to build the new wing.
Third, a submissive person is content not to be in a
leadership role. That is not to say that someone is not ever to seek a
leadership role. What I mean is, when someone else is in charge of making a
decision or a judgment, and I am not, I ought to accept that judgment without
second-guessing my leaders or subjecting them to my judgment. Let’s say a
church court has made a decision in a discipline case. Is it my role to
reexamine the case, find out the details, and decide for myself if they did the
right thing? Or is it my role to trust my leaders, and trust the process and
appeal process that God has provided?
But what if a leader is wrong or doing the wrong thing? Here
we need to carefully discern what sort of, "wrong thing" we are talking about.
Are we talking about leading people into sin here? Certainly we are to follow
no one into sin. Or are we talking about a decision that we consider to be
ill-advised? I was once listening to Elisabeth Elliot’s radio program. She had
received a letter from a woman asking if she had to submit to her husband when
he was wrong. Mrs. Elliot read the letter, let out a deep sigh and said
something like, "Dear, you only have to submit when you think he's wrong. Otherwise
no submission is needed, you're just doing what you both want to do." Oh yeah. Duh.
Now I get it.
Sometimes, though, leaders are wrong by failing to meet
their responsibilities, (such as a man who does not see that his family is
provided for), or even causing harm to those they are to lead by abuse,
neglect, or failing to respect their God-given rights and liberties. Sometimes
leaders attempt to exert control or authority that God has not given them. (Do
any government agencies come to mind?) And let's face it, some people are just
plain mean. But in a biblically-based system of authority for family, church
and civil governments, there is always recourse for those who find themselves
in these situations. It is not a failure to exercise proper submission for the
abused wife to call in the law, for example. Nor is it sin to petition the
courts for relief when one’s rights are not being protected.
All in all, a submissive attitude toward authority is a
matter of trust. We must trust that Christ, who rules over all, will bless us
we respect Him, by respecting those He has placed over us.
Well said. Thanks for a great post. Obviously a lot more could could come out of this subject but this is an excellent thought starter.
Posted by: Rodney Olsen | January 10, 2005 at 10:53 PM
Great post! This post is a springboard to a few of my own thoughts that I put up on my blog today. Thanks for sharing!
Posted by: TheBloke...IntheOuter | January 10, 2005 at 11:55 PM
Here is what I found after studying control and codependency for over 20 years. Churches and Christians often tend to think of submission as codependency and godly authority as control. However, this is 180 degrees from the truth. Frankly dysfunctional people CANNOT submit the Biblcial way; and controlling people certainly cannot lead the Biblical way. I do wish the church at large would get a hold of this fact.
Posted by: Diane R | January 11, 2005 at 12:55 PM
Great post. I like that fire! It's ironic that strong woman can understand submission the best. My wife is a very strong woman and we're just figuring this thing out. In my fear to offend, I fail to lead. Makes for a lot of tap dancing, but we'll get there eventually. I'm visiting all of the new list of evangelicals, so here I am. Come check me out sometime.
Posted by: anselm | January 13, 2005 at 08:09 AM